2am

Things I have learn't this semester:

1. Absolutely nothing.
2. I will not get offered honours. This is not a big deal. (This is a big deal)
3. I suck at time management.
4. I should not pick up calls by private numbers. Some sucker is calling me right now.
   
5. I should bank my pay if I want to save.
6. I need to study better. (faster and more efficiently minus msn and youtube. I don't get hooked onto facebook)
7. My vocabulary is very limited. (Scramble challenges me)
   
8. That sucker is calling again and I'm still not picking up.
   
9. I can lick my nipples.
10. Number 10 was a joke.
11. Sleep is important.
    

"The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy retirement. You drink alcohol, you party, and you get ready for High School. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last 9 months floating... then you finish off as an orgasm! Amen." - George Costanza, Seinfeld.

Notice that I don't receive apologetic messages of appreciation from my ex boyfriends until months and years after breaking up. Is it just me, or is that a tad delayed?

I'm not doubting the sincerity of your expressions, but wouldn't these words have been more valid say, during the last few minutes when we're exchanging our last goodbyes? More influential in the month of the breakup when I was trying to get over you? More moving within the 3 months after breakup when I would've felt something?

Is it because you've just suddenly had a bloody epiphany one day and decided to thank/apologise to all the ex girlfriends you've had in your life? Or did that little voice inside you named Conscience dictate that whole heart-felt message? Well, 2 or 3 lines of a message.

Haha don't get me wrong. Although a bit weird, but thanks. It was nice. Atleast its better delayed than not ever being executed at all. But you know, asking me about the weather would have been more relevant. =S

To be frank,
No one's going to buy your ticket to melbourne because they love you so much. People won't get together and bid you farewell over dim sum because you're going on holidays for a week and they'll miss you. Surprise parties are only thrown for "special people". No, your friend is not going to call you up after 3 months of not talking and offer to make amends. Things just don't work that way. Shot gun? Haha, no one's going to save you a seat in their car or offer your a ride from a to b. Drunk and k.o'd? Sick and coughing your guts out? Then find a place to die quietly. Because in most cases, generosity is not naturally embedded in people to spend a few weeks pay on a few days with you. They ain't gonna notice if you're absent from the country for a week or 2. or 3. Age is just a number. And since we're going all out here, let's be honest. No one gives a shit about the day you were born and it's either a first come first serve process or preconceived mutual obligation between people for shotgunned seats. The rest? hah, find your own way or walk there. "Bro-ship" and "sisterhoods" are shortlived and rarely lived up to. People don't care because they care, they care because it's rude not to pretend to. Atleast during the first few months anyway, when "friendship" is played out closest to the way it's supposed to be. People are lazy, and forgetful so caring is eventually forgotten. So make yourself one of the main players if you wanna be regonised. If you're kinda hanging out on the sidelines then yes, you will fall behind and be marginalised.

So you see, friendship is merely a construct of what people would like it to be but are too lazy driven by self interest to carry it out. The laws of give and take are almost never balanced so please don't base your thesis on a myth. The affinity of humans to each other is actually false advertising. People strive to be accepted and remembered. they waste time, money, effort just so others might remember to sms them on their birthday. Facebook is just a means to remind people about others. Sarah's birthday is tomorrow, oh better message her then.

Don't lie to yourself. you won't be missed when you're gone.